I recently turned 30 years old as well as celebrated five wonderful years being married to one of the most amazing people I have even known. Even though these events happen back in June, I share this now because they are two pretty big milestones that keep creeping back into my head. . . I'm thirty and I have been married for five of those years. That feels good. I like that sentence.
Almost 100% of the reflections I have about these two milestones are positive. I feel very fortunate that I can honestly say that I have thoroughly enjoyed each passing year. I know that sounds simple, but it is true. To an extent that can become annoying to my loved ones that would care for some more planning or organization, but I live in the now. The right now. The year that I am in life, the day I am experiencing, and the people that I am with in that now. So, turning thirty wasn't traumatic for me, it wasn't this big birthday that meant, shit, well now I am old. Shortly after my birthday I was carded (no big deal) and the cashier shared that she was born in the same year as me and she asked me if I cried on my birthday but she said it in a tone that said, "I know you did, I did too." So, I laughed and said "oh, yeah, a few tears," Hell no, I didn't cry. I went to the beach with my family and had double dark chocolate cake while holding my beautiful baby. It was fantastic. My 20's were awesome, why wouldn't my 30's be even more awesomer? In my 20's I graduated from college and got my first "real" job, I feel deeply, madly in love for the first time, I quit my college degree job and sailed around the Caribbean with my honey, I had a son, a beautiful, healthy son. My 20's were the best times of my life. . . until my 30's. I continue to fall deeper in love with my husband. It's less of a 20 something brand new crazy love and more of a respect earned, love you as my equal partner in life, love. It's good love. Yes, I had my first child at 29, which was the most amazing experience to date at that time, but now, at 30, I get to watch him grow and learn. He smiles when I enter the room, my silliness can produce the heartiest of belly laughs, he holds me tight around the neck and trusts that I will do what is best for him. And this is just the first few months of my 30's. Bring it on, I'm ready. No tears here.
The marking of the passing of a year, of marriage and of life instills this self reflection in me, in most people I would imagine. Was I my best self this year? Did I choose love over hate, kindness over frustration, smiles over sour puss faces, peace over showing how right I think I am? Did I choose to be the bigger person, the calmer person, the nicer person, the person who has love in her heart when faced with animosity? The answer is not enough. But, I am conscience of that. I am aware that the next decade of my life is an open slate, ready for me to fill it with the woman, wife, mother, sister, daughter, friend that I would like to be.
Five years of marriage. It doesn't sound like much when I think of the decades of married life my Grandparents and parents have celebrated but in a world of glamorized 72 hour marriages 5 years is something to be proud of. I am not so much proud of the time, as I am proud of the people Conor and I have become while being married. We have learned from each other, we are kind with each other's hearts, we appreciate each other, and we love the best parts of each other and the worst parts, we have forgiven and we have grown. Marriage is a choice, some days a much easier choice than other days, but a choice none the less. Marriage is compromise, (at times announcing that i am compromising right now! --to be sure it is duly noted), its learning how to communicate, how to be an equal in a partnership where you don't perform the same roles and you both have different means of measuring, its learning how to be honest, with myself and with my honey, its learning how to balance being an individual and being the best wife I can be. Marriage isn't just compromise, its also the best thing ever. I constantly have my best friend in tow with me everyday. (It should be noted here that I give Conor the top rung in my BFF ladder and I am pretty sure I am, like, on rung 5 or 6 on his ladder, and this works for us!) Marriage means a lifetime of smooches, of laughter (and I am talking the tears streaming down your face, stomach muscles cramping, accidental nose snorting, pure joy type of laughter) of support, love, teamwork. Being married for me means life is now approached with a buddy, a wing man, a partner in crime, with a person who loves every. single. part. of. me. I am a better, stronger, more full of love me because of Conor. So, yes, hell yes, I am ready for the next 30 years, the next decade, the next tomorrow.
M.
Almost 100% of the reflections I have about these two milestones are positive. I feel very fortunate that I can honestly say that I have thoroughly enjoyed each passing year. I know that sounds simple, but it is true. To an extent that can become annoying to my loved ones that would care for some more planning or organization, but I live in the now. The right now. The year that I am in life, the day I am experiencing, and the people that I am with in that now. So, turning thirty wasn't traumatic for me, it wasn't this big birthday that meant, shit, well now I am old. Shortly after my birthday I was carded (no big deal) and the cashier shared that she was born in the same year as me and she asked me if I cried on my birthday but she said it in a tone that said, "I know you did, I did too." So, I laughed and said "oh, yeah, a few tears," Hell no, I didn't cry. I went to the beach with my family and had double dark chocolate cake while holding my beautiful baby. It was fantastic. My 20's were awesome, why wouldn't my 30's be even more awesomer? In my 20's I graduated from college and got my first "real" job, I feel deeply, madly in love for the first time, I quit my college degree job and sailed around the Caribbean with my honey, I had a son, a beautiful, healthy son. My 20's were the best times of my life. . . until my 30's. I continue to fall deeper in love with my husband. It's less of a 20 something brand new crazy love and more of a respect earned, love you as my equal partner in life, love. It's good love. Yes, I had my first child at 29, which was the most amazing experience to date at that time, but now, at 30, I get to watch him grow and learn. He smiles when I enter the room, my silliness can produce the heartiest of belly laughs, he holds me tight around the neck and trusts that I will do what is best for him. And this is just the first few months of my 30's. Bring it on, I'm ready. No tears here.
The marking of the passing of a year, of marriage and of life instills this self reflection in me, in most people I would imagine. Was I my best self this year? Did I choose love over hate, kindness over frustration, smiles over sour puss faces, peace over showing how right I think I am? Did I choose to be the bigger person, the calmer person, the nicer person, the person who has love in her heart when faced with animosity? The answer is not enough. But, I am conscience of that. I am aware that the next decade of my life is an open slate, ready for me to fill it with the woman, wife, mother, sister, daughter, friend that I would like to be.
Five years of marriage. It doesn't sound like much when I think of the decades of married life my Grandparents and parents have celebrated but in a world of glamorized 72 hour marriages 5 years is something to be proud of. I am not so much proud of the time, as I am proud of the people Conor and I have become while being married. We have learned from each other, we are kind with each other's hearts, we appreciate each other, and we love the best parts of each other and the worst parts, we have forgiven and we have grown. Marriage is a choice, some days a much easier choice than other days, but a choice none the less. Marriage is compromise, (at times announcing that i am compromising right now! --to be sure it is duly noted), its learning how to communicate, how to be an equal in a partnership where you don't perform the same roles and you both have different means of measuring, its learning how to be honest, with myself and with my honey, its learning how to balance being an individual and being the best wife I can be. Marriage isn't just compromise, its also the best thing ever. I constantly have my best friend in tow with me everyday. (It should be noted here that I give Conor the top rung in my BFF ladder and I am pretty sure I am, like, on rung 5 or 6 on his ladder, and this works for us!) Marriage means a lifetime of smooches, of laughter (and I am talking the tears streaming down your face, stomach muscles cramping, accidental nose snorting, pure joy type of laughter) of support, love, teamwork. Being married for me means life is now approached with a buddy, a wing man, a partner in crime, with a person who loves every. single. part. of. me. I am a better, stronger, more full of love me because of Conor. So, yes, hell yes, I am ready for the next 30 years, the next decade, the next tomorrow.
M.
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| My birthday/anniversary week (they are 6 days apart, always quite a fun week) |
Congrats to you both!
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